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"Leave Me A Note"

9:56 a.m. - 2006-12-21

Double Standards and a wife's lament

Forgive me hubby! I�m about to dis� on you! But I know that there are other wives out there who feel the same way.

Marriage is full of double standards.

My wonderful hubby, whom I love deeply, is very forthright about how he wants me to �listen� to him. He wants eye contact. He wants acknowledgement that I�m listening to his every syllable. And he wants me to know the he�s �always� right.

Yesterday morning I woke up exhausted after a very poor nights sleep. A series of poor night sleep actually. I have an extremely low tolerance level when I�m tired, and my wonderful hubby knows it.

I was trying to read something very important to him while he was making his lunch for work. All through the reading, all I could hear was the purposeful wrenching and crackling of the empty cookie packaging.

My reaction should have been one of �honey, do you mind doing that later. I�m trying to share something with you.� But no, I try to speak over the overwhelming, ear smarting noise.

I complete my reading and in return and greeted with an indifferent grunt.

Hurt and disenchanted with the whole marriage thing I walk away in an ever increasing bad mood. My mind is conjuring up ways to give a supreme ass-whoopin� involving a certain husband and a certain cookie container.

These are not happy thoughts. These are �Red sky in morning, sailors take warning� kind of thoughts.

And then, as I�m walking out the door to start my day, he says �what�s wrong?�

I recognize that I don�t deal with confrontation well. I never know how or when to get into it. But I do know that when I�m at boiling point � that is not the time.

Thankfully � my lovely new laptop arrived and turned my burgeoning storm front of an attitude into sunnier, happier display of heartfelt emotion. When I think clearly I know with all my heart that my husband is a complete gift from God, and I am very thankful for him. I even said it in my wedding vows, which I remind myself of � often.

I know that I�ve done things wrong in our marriage. I know that I am not the perfect wife � and never will be. But why the double standards? Why the �what�s good for the goose is not good for the gander?� Why � am I the only one who seems to be aware of it?

This too shall pass. I�m long overdue for my holiday time next week. I will return in the new year with a rested, relaxed, and tolerant attitude.

A collective �ahhhhhhh ��.� can and will be heard throughout the land.

This was before - This is now




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