9:37 a.m. - 2004-05-02
I was just reading Laura405 and she quoted Jack Handey. I love Jack Handey so I have to give you a recent one I found. Keeping in mind that I'm an instigator, and that you might just not get it on first read. Here goes:
The other day I got out my can opener and was opening a can of worms when I thought, "What am I doing?!"
OK - so I can already see the puzzled experssions on you face. That's ok - most people look at me that way.
Well - I did a bone up job yesterday. It's one of those occaisions when you should really make up a fantastic story that shows you in a marvelous light - but I can't. The truth is . . . . I fell off my shoes yesterday and did my foot in. Yes - folks - at 42 I need to learn how to walk all over again. I remember when I was 13 and platform shoes came out FOR THE FIRST TIME and I spent hours going up and down stairs to practice my platform walk. In fact platforms were my first heeled shoes - 1973 or 74.
I digress - I was out shopping with the husband at the Lumber yard that I also work for when we spied something in the scrap bin that we wanted. Just as I was walking (in my platform sandals) towards said bin I stepped wrong and my foot went over. I didn't twist the ankle but managed to fold the widest part of my foot in half. Being embarrassed at my total lack of agility, finesse and don't forget the ever present grace - I laughed it off and started to walk away. OH MY GOSH!!! This was not good.
We wobbled back to the van, foot getting ever larger, ever more achy, and ever more uncomfortable.
What started out as a small goose egg on the top of my foot and base of my baby toe has since turned into a black/gray/blueish spot that encompasses 1/2 my foot. And there is no sense of going to a doctor (walk-in/emerg) because there's a big strike happening here for most anyone involved in a union. (Don't even get me started). Long story short I'm very sure its not broken, only possibly sprained or badly bruised.
The funny part of all this is watching my husband. He's a little a loose ends with what to do - with me - with him - with all of this. I loath the thought of the day when I'm really sick and can't do anything.
I managed to get to church this morning, rather unsteady, but I've managed to find a myriad of goffers. (I tend to do a lot of running around here on a Sunday morning).
I look forward to teetering my way home (all 50 feet of distance) and get the foot elevated and a cold compact on it. And more "Rayman Arena".
Cheers and stay healthy!! LJ