9:45 a.m. - 2004-11-12
1. Muslims do not recognize Judaism as a religion.
2. Jews do not recognize Jesus as the Messiah.
3. Protestants do not recognize the Pope as the leader of the Christian faith.
4. Baptists do not recognize each other at Hooters.
Don't get a offended. It's just a little humour between friends. Now laugh.
ďHow many Christians does it take to change a light bulb?Ē
CHARISMATIC: One - Hands are already in the air.
PENTECOSTAL: Ten. One to change the bulb, and nine to pray against the spirit of darkness.
PRESBYTERIAN: None. Lights will go on and off at predestined times.
ROMAN CATHOLIC: None. Candles only.
BAPTISTS: At least fifteen. One to change the bulb, and three separate committees to approve the change and decide who brings the potato salad and fried chicken.
EPISCOPALIANS: Three. One to call the electrician, one to mix the drinks, and one to talk about how much better the old one was.
MORMANS: Five. One man to change the light bulb, and four wives to tell him how to do it.
UNITARIANS: We choose not to make a statement either in favour of or against the need for a light bulb. However, if in your own journey, you have found that light bulbs work for you, that is fine. You are invited to write a poem or compose a modern dance about your light bulb for the next Sunday service, in which we will explore a number of light bulb traditions, including incandescent, fluorescent, 3-way, long-life, and tinted, all of which are equally valid paths to luminescence.
METHODISTS: Undetermined. Whether your light is bright, dull, or completely out, you are loved. You can be a light bulb, or a turnip bulb, or a tulip bulb. Church-wide lighting service is planned for Sunday. Bring bulb of your choice, and a covered dish.
UNITED: Six. One woman to replace the bulb while five men review church lighting policy.
LUTHERAN: None. Lutherans donít believe in change.
AMISH: What is a light bulb?
Cheers - LJ